2088: The Jumbo​-​Cricket Landfill Incident

by Rocky Kaminski

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about

Rocky Kaminski was born in the 1980s and grew up near the perpetually burning coal mine fire in Centralia, PA. Strapped for cash in his twenties, he signed on to a medical study where they fed him experimental anti-aging drugs, "The Fountain of Youth Pill". He has lived through the start of the 22nd century, when he discovered time travel and came back to now to warn humanity of our dark future.

credits

released October 21, 2015

Rocky Kaminski: Guitar, Vox, Bass, Percussion
Quasaria Bognes: Keys, Vox, Theremin
Jeremy Keim-Shenk: Saxophone

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about

Rocky Kaminski Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Why have you gone so far from the swamp, Four-Eyes?

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Track Name: Flash Flood Warning
We got the flash flood warning
Like a herd of fermented wildebeest it's coming
It's gonna rain on your whole existence
The streetlamps taunt the storm

They found a gold-filled muck
They found a lava rock
They found an earthworm
They found it floodin' on up to their knees

We got a flash flood warning
And we're hanging out underground.

We got the flash flood warning
Like a herd of fermented wildebeest it's coming
It's gonna rain on your whole existence
The streetlamps taunt the storm

They found Jumbo-Crickets
They found water spickets
And they was drippin' with neon fluid
And floodin' on up to their knees

We got a flash flood warning
And we're hanging out underground.
Track Name: Sleepin' on the Side of the Road
In the middle of the winter will be cold
and I'll be sleepin' on the side of the road
Buck naked on the side of the road
in the middle of winter it will be cold

A bug flew by and it glowed
A jug of water is a pocket full o gold
Buck naked on the side of the road
in the middle of winter it will be cold

Hell won't save me
No the heat won't save me
No heavenly father to throw me down a coat
I'll let the funeral save me
Following a beacon'll save me
Big enough for my body
But is it big enough for my my mind

I think nature will save me
A tornado will derange me
One look at the danger
I said I'm not goin' far at all
I'm not goin' far far

The moon is cold and white
And I'll be eatin' on the side of the road
The world is cold and I made a flint fire
Sleepin' on the side
I'm light it up

I said I'm sleepin' on a junkyard tire
Don't wanna stay here for all of my life
I'm only heyna heyna heyna human
But the oil is gone, electricity gone

I'm gonna make it don't waste no more
I'm gonna make it to dance no more
Infected with the disease of life
God's love is the sharpest knife
A little bitter is the chill at night
Hungry critters can smell my breath
If they don't eat me I'll freeze to death
With no belonging now

I'm gonna make it on the side of the road
Uh huh huh
Track Name: Aliens
Well the aliens finally made it
And there's nothing left
Their gonna build their own roads and stuff
Best you jump when their shoes light up
Or you'll never catch the bus
A puzzle in their minds
Used to be a blinding light
Used to be electric eels
But somewhere in the water
I hear the slime police
Life without Ideas, is taking over this place

Freeway full of dead cars
Horizons full of brand new stars
There's nothin' out here but extremophiles
There's nobody around here to call for miles
I'd rather bid on the Philippines
I wonder if I'm from the hills
If only we could find the tombstones
A pawn fire hog that ran with pride
Ma and Pa, I'm gonna live with pride.

The freeway full
Dead 'cause the freeway full
Dead 'cause the freeway full
I'm losing my mind.
Track Name: No More Fish In the Crick
No more fish in the crick
There's no more fish in the crick
Used to be full with smallmouth bass
Now there isn't even a carp

I used to come here with my Pa
With a can of nightcrawlers we caught in the rain
Used to feed our whole families
Fishin' just Pa and me

There's no more frogs around here
and it smells like a sick disease
Used to be surrounded by trees
Now we're just surrounded by stench
Toxic stench

There used to be a winged bird
There used to be palaminos
Used to be a rainbow trout
Now you can't even find a tadpole
Now you can't even find no bugs
Can't even find a dragonfly who used to hover over the stumps
Track Name: Boxes of Time
whoosh
plink
Track Name: Boxes of Brains
We found boxes of brains and their looters
We found pilfering theives and black market treasures
a promissary note to their lenders
It means a nothing to anyone now

There was a landfill of broken computers
They train wild dogs to sick the intruders
An auctioneer was pawning their livers
It means nothing to anyone now

Hyenas set from the zoological park
To run a muck in the city
Radiation fallout made em quick as a snake
The rich mans carcasses are sweeter to taste.
uh uh huh

We found boxes of brains and their looters
They was a pulsing like a body was there.
Hooked them to a nerve conduction machine
Vanished right outta thin air.

That's when I lost my head
Way out on the wheel
My ancestors grow in the weeds of time
Got air in the tires, It's the wagon of doom
A sick man's excorcist comin' home soon.
Track Name: Wild Animals
Wild animals are wearing our trash
There's a possum in the bush with a fake mustache
from a band aid that he found on the ground
He was ugly but now he's hollywood bound

Wild animals are wearing our junk
Soda can boots on the feet of a skunk
Scrap electronics, sequined gowns
Riding limosines all over this town

The critters are wearin the litter
Varmints wearing garbage as garments
They think this is a fashion show
Throw it away so they can wear it the next day

The grizzly he just wants to look hip
With a bike tire hanging off of his lip
With a slicked back hair and his broken sunglasses
Poor little fool, he cares nothin for the planet

The critters are wearin the litter...

Wild animals
They're psychotic
They're psychotic when they wear a bag on their heads
don't wear that bag on your head you skunk
don't wear that bag on your head you rooster
don't wear that bag on your head uh huh huh
Track Name: The Schuylkill County Crater
I came a long long way
Laughing Athena won't cha kick my boon?
smog-bomb-thick throwin a beam out
Turn the pressure valve gone get oily in the ground
and get smoked up
I won't wait I wanna see some
And I'm breakin the fallout
saw it oozin' the green, the gold

Aw Naw me two
Seein double again, a ghost town
A bone dry, a long gone city
evacuated, a scrapyard belly

A message floaing loose in space
Carry coordinates away
Transmitted signals over time

Backslidin on a rig don't even know why
Why sheild em from the devil
Hide em all
Til it only feels a heat
Aw haw haw haw haw haw haw
Make a meal
Don't make a deal
Aw eat up the loot
Bottle em up, howl on, cheat em
Satan not makin my route

They say it’s plain as day
A well ya gushin the fuel
And that stuff gone kill it
Halt, stop, forget it!
a down under the earth
Take us all down with it

Hold on
Said you don’t mean no wrong grandpa
Well you did it
Outta the crater jumped a big groundhog

In an illusionary life
I've got a bottle and a knife
Loud electrons in the rain

I sail outta the hydroplane
Potholes shakin my hitch
a break pedal
a wasteland devil
Breedin out a back in a ditch
I won't do it
Don't make a me never
Never ever ever again
Take a ride out backa the crater
By the schuykill county mines again
Track Name: Fine on the Bayou
Heard a whack and a bang and a boom gone boom
Sounds like a specimen a giant cocoon
We got a butane gas and rotary stomp
Tossin' alien meat to the gators of the swamp
See 'em slobber and drool and glow like moths
In the shallow abyss where intruders get lost
We got electron tubes and a radar fence
We got a broadcast booth and a air defense

Said we're doin' just fine on the bayou
We got solar generators and a camp that floats
Dealin' rummy and a swattin' at the horsefly drones
And it ain't gonna never
Ain't gonna never
Be the same as it was
They ain't gonna never
Ain't gonna never
Spit fire the meat on us

There was a bald-faced hornet and a cuckoo wasp
A parasite livin' on a fishes tongue
And we don't get spooked by the visitor's guns
But we're dancin' and a duckin' from the speckled bugs
Got a coast guard buoys and petrified canes
Reverse osmosis and gallons of rain
Hydraulic ram and a bandsaw bench
At the end of one rope and the start of the next

Said we're doin' just fine on the bayou
We got solar generators and a camp that floats
Dealin' rummy and a swattin' at the horsefly drones
And it ain't gonna never
Ain't gonna never
Be the same as it was
They ain't gonna never
Ain't gonna never
Spit fire the meat on us